The goat leg that made it into the matatu

A bus in Nairobi. One of the main means of transport (image courtesy of matatuworld.com)
A bus in Nairobi. One of the main means of transport (image courtesy of matatuworld.com)
A bus in Nairobi. One of the main means of transport (image courtesy of matatuworld.com)

A few weeks back I was working in Westlands and I come from Thika Road so there was no need for me going into town when I could alight at Ngara and get a bus from there. For those who didn’t know this now you know. “Kangemi twenty, twenty Kangemi”, the conductor shouted. This is a very good deal and a better deal for those going to Kangemi. So I got in and the bus was almost full but there was this one seat at the front, just behind the driver that was empty. Optimistic me jumped to it very fast. Just after I sat, it started smelling like a male goat. I was petrified but I thought I should survive this. No one else looked like they cared but there was a certain way they were looking at me that made me question everything I thought to be true. I knew they weren’t looking at me because of how well I’m dressed because I dress like a hobo and everyone else except the woman seated next to me were in corporate outfits. I call them that, excuse my brain.

The journey started and I bent down to look whether I stepped on goat nonsense but my shoes were clean, I checked my clothes and they were all fine. You’ll come to realize that I’m not the best chooser of seats and someone should make this a career so I can employ them. Maina and King’angi were on radio but I do not remember what they were talking about, can you blame me for not listening! I kept stealing glances at people to see their reactions but nothing. I looked at my seat-mate and she was unbothered. I thought to myself if she does not smell whatever is going on I’m pretty safe. We reached at Chiromo and the lady stood up to alight. A white plastic bag on one hand and a bag that had synthetic leather, a couple of months ago, on the other hand. I looked keenly at the white paper bag and kid you not, a goat leg. My brain could not make sense of what was happening because I could actually not for the life of me see how one would carry a goat’s leg that much exposed and still look unbothered. That is why she was so unbothered because her nostrils had gotten used to the smell of a male goat’s thigh. Carry brooms, metal grills, sacks of maize and beans but please no animals whether live or dead.

If you get in a matatu as the last person and the empty seat is not at the back, there are two things happening here. One, the person seated there has a problem and two, the seat itself has a problem. Alight if you do not want to get mental scarring. I still get scared when a person comes and seats beside me with a paper bag at hand. I am out of cans. I’m unable to can!

There are some habits you should just kill when in a matatu ..1.Eating in matatus – You are crammed in a matatu and…

Posted by 105.5 XFM on Monday, August 4, 2014

8 Replies to “The goat leg that made it into the matatu”

  1. Hilarious posts in this website. Good job.

  2. Nice Read Becky..

  3. Ha Ha…This was funny. Now i know what to do next time i board a matatu late and the only seat is in front

    1. Alight….I repeat, Alight. Hahaha

  4. what i would like to know is how do you know the difference in smell between a female and male goat lol

    1. Rachael Wambua says: Reply

      I would like to say I grew up around goats but that would be a lie so I will just say that I saw a male goat once and that is how he smelt

  5. Hehehe…Two months old but still funny. good one

    1. Girl Sans Doubts says: Reply

      hahaha Thanks.

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